This morning, I returned my first rental car, without a scratch! I did my research and was able to get the under age driver fee waived by registering with USAA. Over the weekend, my family and I were overjoyed to feel what it was like to have a car. We went to a restaurant, the grocery store, church, and the movie theater. I even faced my fear and drove on a rainy night! (I read the manual prior, so I knew how to turn on the windshield wipers!). Although my thesis is not progressing as I would like, I am thrilled to have accomplished this long-time goal. I am [finally] a driver!
I did it! Two days ago, I passed my road test! I feel so empowered. I could not have done it without those who offered me support--whether in the form of a lesson, a pep talk, or a prayer. I am so proud of myself for my persistence in accomplishing this goal. I feel like a brand new woman! While I may not be purchasing a car immediately, I am overjoyed to have overcome this seemingly unyielding obstacle in my life. May this be the beginning of much progress ahead!
My lack of a driver's license has become increasingly crippling for me. Since I grew up in New York City, Driver's Education was not a priority for me. Although I was always interested in driving, I never had a feasible opportunity to learn. My mother does not know how to drive, and public transportation was more than adequate for our traveling needs. During my college years in Ithaca, I learned that I was lacking an essential skill-- a life skill. However, I was not in a position to pay for private Driver's Education and no scholarships or non-profit lessons were available. Still, I completed the pre- licensing requirements and was able to land a few informal lessons with a couple of friends in the community.
Today, I am still struggling to obtain my driver's license. The cost of Driver's Education is only rising, and my brain cells are continually pruning. I am determined to acquire this important life skill. I have a road test scheduled and would be extremely proud of myself if I were able to obtain my license this month. However, since I have no experience parallel parking and still cannot afford lessons, I am not sure that I will be able to pass the road test. This experience, which may seem trivial to someone who learned to drive as a teen, has been really humbling for me. I have been stranded in the heat waiting for buses that never showed up, I have had to miss church for entire winters due to no Sunday bus service, and I have had to walk along pedestrian-unfriendly roads to get to places that are not on the bus route (such as the grocery store and laundromat). I have also had limited residential options--having to rent more expensive apartments that are close to campus. I have been self-conscious about my image as I walk miles in the extreme heat or bitter cold--knowing that as a Black woman pushing a stroller, I would be perceived differently than someone who appeared to be walking to be "green" or eco- friendly. Lacking a driver's license has been a pervasive obstacle for me--one that I look forward to some day overcoming. Having the ability to drive is not only about being able to get around. My lack of a driver's license has been an obstacle in my pursuit of various opportunities, as internship and employment positions increasingly require a driver's license. Moreover, it has affected my sense of agency--my self efficacy. I hope that one day, I am able to support others lacking this type of life skill, whether through Driver's Education scholarships for local driving schools or grant-funded lessons at a local community center. Writing my thesis proposal has been quite an eye-opening process for me. I am learning more about my style as a researcher as I mine the literature, organize the proposal sections, craft my arguments, weave in my sources, and maintain fluidity. I genuinely enjoy exploring the literature and am often surprised to find an article of interest published as recently as within a week of the day I am searching. Seeing new publications released inspires me and stirs within me a sense of urgency to contribute to the field. I realize that my sense of urgency is most fueled when I am preparing to collect primary data. I am excited to see whether the results from my regression analyses suggest a relationship between family structure and adult psychosocial wellness. However, I yearn for the opportunity to, in this case, follow up with street-identified men and women with varying family structures to learn about how they think their family situations affect their well-being. I can imagine a focus group with street-oriented parents in which they discuss the (im)balance between their family life and the other parts of their lives. I can envision, for example, non-residential fathers discussing how they grapple with engaging in illegal activity to provide for themselves and their children, some of whom they may rarely see (for varying reasons). For now, I must focus on analyzing the psychological well-being and social cohesion subscales of the Wilmington PAR survey. Although qualitative data was collected in this large project, those data are beyond the scope of my thesis analyses. However, I look forward to the (hopefully near) future when I can conduct mixed-methods research and invest the time needed to engage respectfully with both qualitative and quantitative data.
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AuthorI am an Assistant Professor of Public Health who engages in research, evaluation, and community work that effects positive change in individuals, families, and communities. Archives
June 2020
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